Marriages are hard work. Even the healthiest relationships need care and attention, and unhealthy ones can be difficult to repair.
If you do your best to remain objective, it’s often possible to see the warning signs that precede a divorce coming well in advance.
1. Your Problems Are Out In The Open
Trouble tends to fester when it’s left in the darkness. If either you or your spouse is seriously dissatisfied, the issue may inevitably make its way into the open.
Once you both know about a problem that one or both of you have, it’s not necessarily a sign that your marriage is over.
Stating the problem isn’t enough to fix it, though. When your problems are clear to both parties, your marriage has a limited lifespan; it’s time to either fix the problem or admit the match between the two of you is coming to an end.
2. Your Levels Of Commitment Are Different
This sign applies both specifically to how you address any major issues with your marriage and more generally to how you and your spouse treat each other.
If it’s clear that your spouse isn’t as interested as you are in making positive changes, that difference in commitment becomes a problem in and of itself. It can be addressed, but it’s one of the hardest marriage problems to overcome.
You face an uphill battle whether you need to convince your spouse to be more attentive or summon up a greater level of commitment yourself. If matching up your levels of commitment proves to be impossible, your marriage’s days may well be numbered and it’s time to look for a divorce attorney.
3. You Don’t Work Together On Little Projects Or Big Problems
A good marriage is inherently a team. You and your spouse should be an effective unit when you work together.
This is about more than tackling big problems like raising children or overcoming relationship issues; it also encompasses little day-to-day jobs like preparing meals and cleaning up.
If you take a careful look at all of the work invested in keeping your marriage running and discover that you and your spouse are spending more time working on your own rather than together, it’s a serious warning sign.
Your marriage should not be a separate entity to which you and your spouse dutifully contribute time and effort; it needs to be a partnership.
4. Your Spouse Treats Money Differently
This final sign is often difficult to detect, but it can be one of the most serious. It should never be the first signal you go looking for. You shouldn’t pry into your spouse’s financial situation unless you have good reasons to suspect serious marital trouble.
If there are already plenty of warning signs, though, be on the lookout for your spouse attempting to hide money away or lay exclusive claim to financial resources. This behavior typically means your spouse has already given up on your marriage and is planning to start over in the near future.
You need to be absolutely certain that you uncover the truth of the matter before you come to this conclusion, though.
Not every marriage is going to last forever; divorce is a common way to end a relationship. It’s not even necessarily a bad thing; splitting up can remove two people from a situation that makes them both unhappy.
Divorce is far more traumatic when it comes as a surprise, though.
Keep a close eye on your relationship with your spouse and pick up on the signals that might indicate serious trouble ahead.